Timmy's Valetines...Love is Not Self Seeking

When I was growing up one of our favorite times in school was Valentines Day. I remember my mom helping me decorate an old shoe box with crepe' paper and then we'd go out and buy a package of Valentines for me to give away. I had to be careful who I gave them to since you sure didn't want to give a girl in the second grade some mushy card. The exciting thing was to bring your box home and look at all the cards you received from your classmates.

I read a story of a little boy, Timmy we'll call him, who was not very popular in school. In fact he was made fun of and often left out of games and kids parties. When Valentines Day rolled around he couldn't wait to get his box and Valentines together. He took a long tedious time picking out the right Valentine for each classmate.

As he left for school the next morning he took care in packing the Valentines and carrying his box out the door and to the bus. His mother knew Timmy was not very popular and as he left she couldn't help but have a heavy heart knowing that he would probably get few Valentines from the other children. She decided that he would need some extra love when he came home so she spent the afternoon making cookies and waiting for Timmy to return home on the afternoon bus.

Finally the bus drove up and Timmy stepped off the bus with head bowed and shaking it back and forth. As he approached his mother she heard him mumble "not a one". At this her heart sank and tears began to well up in her eyes with concern for her disappointed child. As he approached her, he looked up smiled and said, "Not a one, I didn't forget a single one."

Love is not self-seeking. When we love the way the Jesus wants us to love it means that we want the best for others. It means that we are just as concerned about others feelings, others needs, others wants and others welfare just as we are ours.

When we think of others we hurt when they hurt, we rejoice when they are happy, we weep with them, laugh with them and truly want the best for them. Love that is not self seeking has no room for jealousy. It has no room for harboring ill will. It puts others ahead of ourselves. As a result it makes us a better and happier person.

A man once died and was given a tour of Hell. When he walked into the room he saw a long table with everyone sitting around it. The table was full of the most delicious food imaginable. The problem was that each person had one arm tied behind their back and a three foot spoon tied to the other hand. They were crying and angry because even with all the food it was out of their reach.

The man was depressed with the scene so he asked to see Heaven. When he walked into the room he saw the same scene, table, food, spoon and hand behind back. But they were all laughing and having a great time. The difference was that they were feeding each other.

Love that is not self seeking is love that feeds each other.

How Ruuuuude

One afternoon I called the phone company to check on an issue with my bill. It was about a quarter before 5:00 when I called and was put on hold by their computer. The wait was to be several minutes and intertwined with the music was an occasional, " We're sorry for your wait. Someone will be with you shortly." This went on for fifteen minutes then at 5:00 the recording came on, but this time it was different, "Thank you for calling. Our office hours are Monday through Friday 8 to 5. Please call back during our normal business hours. I thought, "How Rude". I had patiently waited to talk to someone then was abruptly dismissed by an insensitive computer.

I genuinely despise rude acting people. I really feel sorry for restaurant waiters, clerks at return desks, customer service representatives and just about anyone who has to spend their day dealing with people on a personal basis. People can be rude at times, sometimes on purpose and other times out of frustrations. Of course the people behind the counter can also be just as rude to their customers.

I've been to restaurants where people complained about the prices, berated the waiter for slow service or because something wasn't cooked right. One time I was with a preacher at a breakfast and he was so rude that I almost changed tables rather than be seen with him.

I read the story of a man who went into the athletic store to buy a baseball bat for his son. He spoke rather rudely to the clerk and then realizing what he had done apologized to her. "I've been at the Department of Motor Vehicles all morning dealing with a rude lady over my auto registration and I'm sorry I've taken it out on you." The clerk looked at him holding the bat and smiled "Do you want this gift wrapped or are you going back there this afternoon?"

Love means that we treat people like we want to be treated. Waiters don't cook the food, clerks don't set the return policies and customer service reps don't make the products that are giving you problems. They are there just doing their job in spite of how they may be treated.

Unfortunately in today's society rudeness appears to be on the rise. People are impolite to each other. We make degrading remarks about people. We talked down to those that serve us. We're quick to tell people exactly what we think without giving their feelings any thought. We ridicule, cut down, demean and often have a "better than you" attitude. We are impolite, have bad manners, bad attitudes, yelling, screaming, griping complaining and display snobbish noses.

Love is not rude. In other words love treats people like people and not things. It approaches people with the feeling "I care about you". Love listens. Love opens doors. Love says thank you and you're welcome. Love shows appreciation. Love makes people glad they passed out way. Love is not rude.

Remember Rudy on "The Cosby Show"? When her friend would treat her wrongly she'd always say, "How ruuuuuuude." Just maybe if we started telling ourselves this every time we stepped out of line it would help us to make everyone else's world a better place to live.

As the old saying goes, "You can catch more flies with honey than vinegar." So trying being nice to each person you meet and see how it changes people's lives.