In the Christmas story “The
Grinch Who Stole Christmas” there is a scene where the Grinch has packed up
everything in the house, except where the Whos were sleeping I guess, and
stuffed it all up the chimney. He takes the Christmas tree and starts to shove
it up the chimney when in walks Cindy Lou Who, who had gotten out of bed for a
cup of cold water. “She stared at the Grinch (who was dressed like Santa Claus)
and said Santy Claus, ‘Why? Why are you taking our Christmas tree? Why?’ The
Grinch gave her a completely illogical reason, “There’s a light on this tree
that won’t light on one side.” Of course the real reason was “the Grinch hated
Christmas, the whole Christmas season. But please don’t ask why, no one quite
knows the reason.”
She didn’t scream and yell
that there was a burglar in the house. She didn’t run to wake mom and dad Who.
She didn’t just stand there and watch, wondering what in the world Santa Claus
was up to. She stood there watching this
act which she really didn’t understand and asked the simple question, “Why?”
It is the failure to ask
that one question, “Why?”, and listen to the answer that keeps many areas of
disagreement from ever being truly brought out in the open and solved. Maybe we
don’t want to know, “Why?”, because it is contrary to what we think. Maybe the
person doesn’t really know, “Why?”, but that come out unless we ask. Sure the
answer may be completely illogical. It may make no sense to us at all. But at
least by asking it gives a starting point to work out issues that cause
tension.
We all have reasons why we
like or dislike someone or something. It may or may not have a basis. The
reason may not exist for everyone else or may even be totally illogical, but
until we ask the question and try and see the other side of how people think
then it is impossible for any group to come together. We don’t have to agree or
like the same thing to work together, but it is essential that we understand
what those standing beside us are feeling in order to best utilize talent and
minimize controversy.
I’m a big Dallas Cowboy fan.
I have been since I was able to get 50 cent tickets as a Junior High football
player to go watch them in the Cotton Bowl. I like Romo. Why? Because he is a
good quarterback and is blamed for things for which he has no control many
times. I don’t care much for Jerry Jones’ way of managing the team. I don’t
know him so I can’t say if I like him or not. I don’t like the Philadelphia
Eagles! Why? Should you even have to ask?
A few years ago there was a
lady in my Bible class that hated the Cowboys and loved the Eagles. We would
kid each other the weeks that they played each other. We strongly disagreed.
The main reason we got along though and were able to be open about it was
because we knew why each other felt the way we did. Why? She grew up in the
Philadelphia area as an Eagle fan. She had a good reason, as much as I
disagreed with her, but just knowing why made all the difference in the
relationship.
It’s important for unity and
a good working environment to be less confrontational and more relational. The
way to accomplish that is to move away from arguing about differences and
moving toward trying to understand the “Why?” Maybe the reason is valid to
them, but not to you. Maybe the reason is skewed by false information. Maybe
the reason brings something to light that has been ignored, but the only way to
know the reason a person feels the way they do is to ask them, “Why?”, then sit
back and listen attentively.
_______________
“I have the right to do anything,” you say—but
not everything is beneficial. “I have the right to do anything”—but not
everything is constructive. No one should seek their own good, but the good
of others.
1 Corinthians 10:23-24
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